Hopefully, you are like me, and all of your fantasy leagues are bliss. You are winning ships and taking pics. There is nothing better than a fantasy league with all your college buddies. Still, there is nothing worse than a league with no chemistry, like a date where you pick up the girl, and she still lives with her parents at 32. I mean, that’s not the end of the world but guaranteed she has a curfew and is probably vegan? No Dude can have that. I know fantasy football is perfect, but maybe there are some leagues you might be better without?
- Rolling Waivers and Reverse Standings; there are only two reasons your league is not using FAAB(Free Agent Acquisition Budget). 1. You’re under the age of twelve. 2. You’re a stubborn dude who plays with sandbaggers who don’t like the free market. If you dont know what FAAB is, you’re playing in a league that rewards the loser.
- Last-Minute Larry- you know the league that isn’t full the day before the draft, so the commissioner invites his creepy neighbor or father-in-law. Just back out because that guy’s chances of taking the league seriously are slim to none. It is always better to kick someone out than to ask everyone at church.
- Pizza at drafts. Again if you are 12 years old, this is acceptable. If not, start the BBQ, and everyone pitches in for some meat.
- Playing on ESPN, this might be where the 12-year-olds are right. They aren’t clowning around on that dinosaur app that hasn’t been updated since 2015. Instead, switch to Sleeper, the most customizable platform out there. This will be the hardest thing to change. Old habits die hard, and you will have some complaints at first. But after a month, everyone will thank you. I won’t play in a league, not on Sleeper (not a sponsor), ever again.
- Remote drafts, get the Dudes together, and draft in person. Make your draft a priority, so you wouldn’t miss your daughter’s wedding. Don’t miss your draft either. Draft day is definitely the biggest unofficial holiday, and you should get the day off.
- The perfect group text; not too much texting, just enough that your wife is ticked that you are on your phone too much.
- Only rewarding the winner: Winners win. That’s great, and all but losers need to be taught a lesson. If your league only cares about the winners, it’s overrated. Heck, pie a guy in the face, I don’t care. The loser needs something awful to happen, and if you’re not doing it, you’re wrong. If you ask me, PPs(Public Pieings) need to make a comeback. Take that Dude to main street and pie his dome.
It is not too late to save your league. Send this to your commissioner and save your fantasy league, maybe even some friendships?